Photo by Arthur Rachbauer on Unsplash
Inside: Entitlement and true kinship with animals, what comes with your paid subscription and how to upgrade your subscription.
If you like this post, please click the ❤️ button below so more people will find their way here. Thank you!
Me: It's all about RECIPROCAL, respectful relationship.
You: Of course it is, Janet. What the heck is the big deal about that?
Me: It’s that little word ‘reciprocal’ that is sometimes forgotten about.
Practicing Reciprocity
I’m going to go out on a limb and say that recognizing reciprocity is part of your true kinship practice. But upon closer examination is it reciprocity or entitlement?
I bet each one of us has experienced someone who expects you to drop whatever you're doing so you can accommodate their request:
…Would you mind watching the kids while I go to a movie?
…I'd love to have you come to my party; by the way, bring your music and you can play the piano for us while you're here
…My car is going into the repair shop, can I borrow yours that day? I'm going out to lunch with friends (and of course, you haven't been invited to the lunch).
Uffda. Doesn’t that sting?
It's the same with animal kin.
Say, for example, there’s a fox that keeps showing up in your yard and you're always running to her/him with requests:
***Fox, what wisdom do you have for me today?
***I'm ready for you to heal me today
***I’m lonely, keep me company
True kinship doesn’t happen overnight, or happen solely because it’s your intention. It happens when there’s mutual consent and willingness from both the animal and you. Should that happen, there’s then a building and tending of the relationship. This takes time, patience, perseverance, respect and the willingness to heed and respect another’s agency.
True kinship is not all about you, it not about (usually unconsciously) feeling entitled to having the animal meet your needs.
True kinship is about using those words we all learned early on in life: please, may I, thank you. It's about your willingness to hear no, maybe, or even silence from an animal. It's about your willingness to step away from entitlement.
Ready To Do This?
Does this sound like a lot? That’s because it is. What you’re actually doing is changing yourself: your perspective, your expectation, your sense of entitlement and perhaps even your need to be a savior (gasp) to animals.
The good news is this kind of work is meant to be done in community, not solo. Community offers us support, accountability, encouragement and even cheer-leading when needed.
If this resonates with you, consider becoming a member of this Substack community. You’ll find more about true kinship with animals on my website.
Thank you all, for supporting my work. Paid subscribers have access to this month’s true kinship perks and community participation.
This month the focus is noticing and accepting what’s right in front of you instead of making assumptions about how you think it ‘should’ be. And believe me, I am truly writing from experience when it comes to this. 🙄
Why not try a paid subscription for a month, see how it resonates with you?
Keep reading with a 7-day free trial
Subscribe to True Kinship With Animals With Janet Roper to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.